A teacher of mine often says "no wrongness" when he hears traditional shaming and blaming statements made in session. I enjoyed this concept and shared it with my clients. I remind my clients were ultimately here to learn spiritual lessons and to grow and become the best version of ourselves. We are here to love ourselves and others more. What other purpose is there? We got lost in the overwhelming much of life and suddenly find ourselves in the midst of ego projects. Never lose your real visition or your core purpose! But also accept and love your mistakes. Do not be ashamed. Our mistakes teach us more than our failures, and they teach others as well. THey provide room for greater understanding and connection. ANd the more loving and forgiving we are of ourselves, the more capable we are of honestly admitting mistakes, taking ownership, and working through them in order to make it right. Ironically, the only way to have this path towards humility, self acceptance, and a deep awareness of others feelings is to loosen up the moral judgment. We aren't perfect and neither is anyone else. Who are we to be above the making of mistakes? Instead of saying "I shouldn't have done that" because none of my clients are perfect, say, I did, and I have the strength to take accountability and ownership and correct what damage I may have caused. Our friends want us to show up for them, they don't want us to be perfect.
The nature of trauma and how we are forced to create a false self
brief introduction to the enneagram
